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Now there’s an irony that would make Lord Nelson blanch. (Please don't bother looking that up. You're reading a fucking story, for crissakes. ) Anyway, it was nearing Christmas the first time I ate at Bernie's. Handfuls of cheap-ass tinsel clung to the windows and strings of ancient, multi-colored Christmas bulbs were strewn along the dark wood and low ceilings as if they had been tossed about by a delinquent ten year old. Kurochka free live web cam sex. The place felt cramped, dingy and cold. Maybe that's how it really feels in an English pub, but I had a feeling the English did 'old' way better than Nguyen was doing it here. So, why did I ever stop there? Maybe I just love English food. Yeah, and fuck you, too.
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Meganxxx online canada girl for sex chat. I heard that. As it happens, I DO love English food. If you don't, it's only because it's reputation has been soiled by a French conspiracy. (See what I did there?) Anyway, back to the Bangers. (You didn't really think I'd put the word 'banger' in a story without actually yanking hard on that obvious an innuendo, did you?) For you Luddites and Frenchies out there who don't know what a banger is, it's a sausage. Filipinosex chat rooms. Okay, okay. Knock off the fucking giggling. This isn't a damn comedy. As it happens, the English have been making sausages way longer than the Germans, and as anyone who knows me will tell you, I love sausages. (I know what you're thinking and if you so much as fucking smirk, I swear I'm going reach out and slap the shit out of you. ) Right, so I was dithering between the Toad in the Hole and the Bubble and Squeak when I was greeted by a curvaceous woman in a bright red 'Mrs Santa' outfit.
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Online tamilsex girls video com. She was a round woman, Rubenesqu even, as a friend would later say. I didn't know about that. I thought a Ruben was a sandwich, but what the hell. I prefer a woman who can appreciate a good hoagie anyway. Specks of red and green were sprinkled from her rosy cheeks all the way down over her very impressive breasts. Online ondian webcam sex.
She looked like a glitter-bomb had exploded over her. I just sat there, mesmerized by the plastic stardust covering her tits.
Every time she moved, her wonderful mounds jiggled, causing the glitter to sparkle under the ancient, yellow lights. I couldn't take my eyes off of her, and I had to force my mouth closed as she prepared to take my order with an equally glitter-covered pen.
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Muslim sex hidden cam. I think women know what a show of splendid cleavage does to a guy and her smile confirmed it. "How are you tonight, sweetie?" There was a definite glint in her eye. "I'm getting hungrier by the minute,I replied, grinning. Let me tell you, that was no lie. Lewisport kentucky girls fucking. She looked fucking delicious and the longer I spent gazing over her cleavage the hungrier I got. Eventually, I got around to noticing the sleigh-shaped name tag with 'Betty' drawn across it in more of the same green glitter. "Nice to meet you, Betty. I just love your outfit. " I was smirking terribly and Betty flushed happily back at me. "Thank you, babe. Play online hd sex videos. What's your name, or should I just call you Santa?" "Oh, Christ no, I'm Bob," I said, trying my best to sound cool.
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Believe me, that wasn't easy.

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